Purim is paradise [pardes and the English paradise are Persian words] for sex abusers. They themselves may be less inhibited while under the influence. Giving alcohol to younger boys can make them less resistant to influence and to abuse. Afterwards, the offender can claim it was silliness, not as claimed, abuse. I have heard too many stories of abuse that happened on Purim, typically involving older boys or young men with teens. Similar stories also happen other times of the year in Chabad with its ubiquitous vodka. That elixir of kiruv (outreach) knocks down boundaries and restraints.
Parents need to monitor settings where kids are, or be sure some other responsible adult is monitoring. They also need to regulate alcohol use. I am not puritanical about alcohol for under-age kids on Purim. But it becomes dangerous beyond limited quantities.
Alcohol kills in large enough quantities. Hatzolah organizations around the country report deaths and serious emergencies after Purim. Don’t let it happen to your kid.
Be funny, be smart, be happy afterwards.
Chag sameach! Happy Purim
Jewish law has explicit categories for harm: nezek, tzar, ripui, sheves and boishes. Sex abuse, depending on the particulars can include all five: physical harm, pain, medical healing costs, incapacitation, and shame.
Even those who don’t know technical halacha ought be sensitive to the ethical concern woven through rabbinic teaching about the grave sin of shaming others or even speaking hurtful words. It ought to be so much more obvious that violations of intimacy and tznius in ways that shame are especially grave sins and deeply harmful.
Moshe Friedman got a sweetheart deal which kept him out of jail and off the sex offender registry when he pled guilty on February 1, 2017 to a misdemeanor charge of “child endangerment” (NY Daily News).
Some of his defenders will say he didn’t really do anything serious. Maybe he just slapped a boy who was misbehaving. But you won’t say that after you read the police report with allegations of a string of sadistic sexual tortures that led to his indictment for multiple felony acts which could have put him in prison for decades.
According to the signed and sworn police report which was the basis of his indictment: The People of the State of New York County of Kings v Moshe Friedman:
…Between September 01, 2013 … and June 06, 2014 … at … [a yeshiva in Boro Park], the defendant … on multiple incidents per month …
- Did strike the informant’s hand with defendant’s hand when informant’s hand was injured and treated with a cast
- Did place defendant’s hand on the informant’s exposed buttocks
- Did grab the informant’s penis,
- Did insert the defendant’s finger into the informant’s anus
- Did insert a banana into the informant’s anus
- Did put the defendant’s mouth on the informant’s buttocks
- Did place the informant’s penis inside the defendant’s mouth
- Did bite the informant’s penis with defendant’s mouth
- Did tie a string around the informant’s penis
- Did shove a rag into the informant’s mouth
- Did tie the informant’s lips shut with string
- Did display a gun to the informant and state to the informant in sum and substance, “you’d better not tell your parents, or I’ll kill you and your family.”
The … [boy was born in] 2007.