Malcolm Gladwell, is the author of The Tipping Point, Blink…, and two other best-selling books which translate social science research into lay language. In this week’s New Yorker Magazine he reveals the craft of grooming, the techniques used by molesters to get their victims habituated to tolerating more and more invasions while squelching their aversion and impulse to tell someone else. He also explains how molesters figure out which kids are vulnerable and which are best left alone. For example, a coach might ask a kid to stay behind after practice. If the kid says I need my parent’s permission, the molester moves on to another kid. If a kid complains to parents after tentative physical probes the molester apologizes for any misunderstandings and moves to another kid.
The article is mostly about Jerry Sandusky at Penn State but it describes some other molesters as well. Anyone with a little seichel can figure out how to translate the stories and the lessons so they fit the orthodox Jewish world. If you want to better understand how molesters can often pull the wool over our eyes, read In Plain View: How Child Molesters Get Away With It.
Read it and think about how we can make sure our kids and other kids are no longer easy bait for these evil trawlers.